Fitspiration, Healthspiration, Bodspiration. An Update!

I passed these every day (for $2 a slice on the cruiseship!) My defence was chanting: “this is not good food….this is not good food…” then diving into the nearest salad bar.

So an overdue update on my health-spiration change. I’m absolutely ELATED to tell you that I’ve lost 8kg since starting out in late November. I truly cannot believe it, namely because a) my thyroid condition makes it damn DAMN hard to lose anything and b) I have not even started an exercise plan. I’ve joined a gym, but haven’t even set foot in it. I know. Lame, lame, lame.

But…I’ll be getting in there shortly (I’m aiming for at least twice a week in the name of being realistic), so am hopeful that it will help change things up even more once the eating thing settles in and I hit any plateaus.

The best things I’ve learned (I take no credit for these by the way, they are tips and thoughts from others who are helping me on the way):

THE MINDSET:

- there’s no point in a diet, only a lifestyle. It can’t just be “I’m gonna eat well until I get to my goal.” It has to be a change for good.

- reframe what you think is “good food.” For example, on the cruiseship, I was bemoaning how hard it was to be in front of all this amazing array of good food (dessert buffet anybody?!) and not able to eat it. My fellow comedian (and extremely buff and healthy guy!) Mad Mike Bennet challenged me on what I thought “good food” was. Once I started viewing the foods that were healthy, wholesome, clean and helpful to my body as “good foods”, it was a heck of a lot easier to stick with the plan!

- I pay attention to how foods make me feel. And…the good food DOES make me feel good. Lighter. Not bloated. Cleaner. The other day on my cheat day, I started eating some chocolate and honestly, I couldn’t even finish it. THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED. I felt so ill. It was great!

- I have just started another DietBet. The first one I won and more than doubled my money. I think I’m just one of those people who NEEDS competition – or at least accountability with the bonus of my money being on the line – to succeed!

THE PRACTICALITIES:

- protein, protein, protein and veges, veges, veges. If I had to sum up the one principle I’m basing this whole eating lifestyle on, it’s just prioritising these every time I eat.

- cut out sugar (replace with stevia). I haven’t completely cut out fruit, but I am minimising it.

- drink water, drink water, drink water. Even on days when I’ve slid on the diet (particular over Christmas), I’ve made an effort to keep drinking, no matter what.

- eat regularly, even when you don’t feel hungry. Just eat the good stuff!

- find substitutes. For instance, I have a soft drink habit (diet ones, Coke Zero, etc. but still. Not great for your body!) which, while not eliminating it completely, I have cut down MASSIVELY by replacing with soda water. My fridge is always full of it now, I add a bit of lemon, some mint (if I can be bothered making the trek out to the garden. I am beyond lazy, I know) and it’s working. Apparently all I seek is fizz and I feel suitably treated.

I got an email from a friend the other day asking me if I could share some of the eating tips I’d been raving on about, sent to me by my friend Dave. With his permission – and his disclaimer that he’s mainly paraphrasing other peeps who now what they’re on about – I’m sharing his email below. I need to stress that I have absolutely NOT followed this diet strictly, nor have I followed any “diet”, but the principles have helped massively (e.g. protein/vege rich, having a cheat day, drinking heaps of water, etc.) I would say I’ve stuck to his advice about 85% and have had AMAZING results even just with that.

Over to Dave:

If it’s weight loss, you might want to consider trying something that I used to drop a lot of weight this year, a modified ketogenic diet. Essentially it’s a diet that lowers the amount of carbs and sugar consumed, which makes your body burn fat and protein instead. (Think Aktins without the nasty side effects.)

The goal is to keep your blood sugar and insulin levels from spiking. When your body releases insulin to combat ingested sugar and carbs, it starts storing anything it can find as fat.

Try this for say 2 or 3 days and see if it works for you. If so, you can give a shot for reals. If not, nothing lost. When I’m doing it full on, I give myself 1 day a week to eat whatever I choose (helps with cravings etc).

So, for 2 days, eat nothing with sugar added. This includes lactose (milk sugar) etc. For breakfast, have 30 grams of protein (your choice), a handful of veg (avoid carrots and tomatoes), 2 eggs however you choose, and either beans or lentils (for the added protein, plus this is your carbs…)

For example, I have 2 fried eggs (yes FRIED!!! with butter), refried black beans, a handful of spinach, and chicken.

For lunch and dinner, I have protein (30gs), beans of some kind, and veg. I’ll skip the beans with lunch usually.

Because you’re not consuming lots of carbs, the fat in the food you’re eating will keep you full until your next meal, so you won’t feel like snacking. If you do, and can’t stop, try pepperoni (make sure it has minimal carbs and no sugar), and a small handful of almonds or cashews.

Just before bed, you can have a small spoonful of peanut butter (to regulate your blood sugar through the night. Also, LOTS of water. Try for 2 litres a day. (You can’t drink much else, so why not!). Artificial sweeteners should be kept to a minimum, but a little splenda in your coffee/tea or a diet coke won’t hurt.A glass of red wine is ok too.

There’s more to it, but try that out and see how it works. If you avoid sugar for 2 days, you should see your weight drop like crazy. My first week I was down I think 7 pounds. After 6 months, my cholesterol levels are fantastic, and doctor’s check up was great. (I need more vitamin D, but you shouldn’t have that problem in sunny Oz).
Exercise is fine, but real weight loss is diet based. If you go hard on cardio etc, you’ll need to eat more to compensate, (and most people grabs carbs, which completely ruins the effect.) So if you do hit the gym, go easy on the cardio, or have something carby 30 minutes before.

You need to know a couple of things:

1 – the initial giant weight loss is the result of you burning up your glycogen stores (sugar your body stores). You won’t see a massive continual drop like that, but it’s a great way to start.

2 – every 7 to 10 days, you’ll need to load up on carbs in order to raise your leptin levels (we don’t want your thyroid to start shutting down). This is what we call “cheat day”. It’s wonderful. From wake up to bedtime, you can eat ….anything. Yup. anything. In order to limit some of the damage, a bit of exercise 90 seconds before eating and 90 minutes after (like 1.5 minutes worth) will help. Try to poo that day as well. Coffee helps, or prunes, or magnesium.

Apart from helping with cravings, cheat day raises the amount of calories your body expects, so that you don’t plateau (body gets used to less calories, stops losing weight). After cheat day, it might take a day or two for that glycogen to drop off, don’t panic.

Drinks LOTS of water still.

3 – If you want the full meal deal, the program I followed is called “The Four Hour Body” by Tim Ferris. Don’t worry, he’s not a diet guru or anything. He’s a bored rich guy who started experimenting with weight loss etc. This is his results.
Other good reading is “Why We Get Fat” and “Good Calories, Bad Calories” by Gary Taubes. It explains the whole slow carb theory, and such.

Even after 9 months, it amazes me that I can eat like this for a day or two and lose 2-4 pounds (after a cheat day).

***

Hope that’s helpful, let me know what your’e doing! If there’s one thing that’s helped me stay committed on this journey it’s having other people to support, encourage and commiserate with!

x

Goal for 2013: Enjoy It.

I am a (somewhat ashamed) New Year’s Resolution kinda gal. But…this year, I’ve opted out of making any of my traditional ridiculous claims to heights-a-lofty, and instead decided to keep it simple. My goal? To enjoy it.

My scrawlings based on Susannah Conway’s rather rocking (and FREE!) downloadable “Unravelling the Year Ahead” workbook.

A few triggers for this:

1) Earlier this year, I got an email from my literary agent. She commented that I’d been so busy this year and asked a very simple question: “are you enjoying it?” Now, whether or not she meant that to rock my soul, so that I’d think deeply about whether I was in fact, enjoying the ride, or whether she was simply making small talk, we will probably never know – it was, after all, written some months ago, so I doubt she’d remember her original intention even if I questioned her on it, which I wouldn’t, given that I do not wish to annoy her with my overly analytical and self-obsessed ways. YOU, however, person who has actively sought out such punishment…HOLD TIGHT! It made me question myself. Am I enjoying it? Am I? I was unsure of the answer.

2) On my first cruise in November (which I LOVED, by the way, don’t get me wrong, I’m not a total Scrooge Mc-Hate-Life!), I had a moment. There I was, sitting in the most crystal blue water I have ever had the tremendous fortune to set eye on, let alone my swimsuit clad bod in, when I realised to my horror, that despite this moment where I was essentially LIVING INSIDE PINTEREST, I could NOT relax. My mind would not switch off. It just wouldn’t. It’s not that I was wound up, it was merely that state of “rolling through my to-dos, should-dos and what-ifs” like the scrolling flight charts in the world’s busiest airport, showed itself for what it was: my default setting. I was mortified. If I couldn’t relax enough to enjoy paradise, then where and when the hell could I?

The setting in which I realised there is something wrong with my enjoyment-meter.

3) Finally, at Woodford just gone, I realised that something ain’t working in Jenny land. I appreciated the week, I enjoyed myself massively onstage (truly, it seems sad to me that this is the one place I really can relax and have fun, but this said, it causes me tremendous anxiety and physical pain both before and after the show goes on!) and of course, love that my family truly embraces and leaps on the week of festivities with rabid enthusiasm. BUT…again, I don’t think I really enjoyed it. And this is Woodford! If you can’t enjoy Woodford (when the weather is good, of course!) then what can you? I feel like I was so focused on the next gig, the next gig, the next gig, that I couldn’t really just let go and savour the wonders. I was too tense and preoccupied. Mostly with myself. And I hate that. I want to change that. I want to act professionally without taking it all too seriously. I want to appreciate the privilege of being able to perform (I still remind myself before I step onstage sometimes just how damn lucky I am to be alive and walking out there) and indeed, to appreciate and enjoy the tremendous honour of living in a world where I can actually do this for a living. I feel like a spoiled brat even being all “poor me, I don’t truly enjoy my incredibly privileged life!” but therein lies the problem. I KNOW I’m privileged. I KNOW I should be grateful. And I am. I just need to work on how to relax more so that I can appreciate the ride more. Otherwise, really. What is the point in any of this?

Rant over.

I want to change. I want to focus on learning how to relax, stretching every day, treating my body well (thus far I have lost 8kg since I started eating well, so incredibly happy and encouraged by that!), planning more down-time and banning myself from any work-stuff, being more organised in my work-time so that I can be more productive to free up other time, so that I can take the time and effort to really enjoy and savour my family too.

That’s it.

What about you? Are you making any resolutions, complex, simple or somewhere in between?

Your Stories Wanted! (Or: “Be Part of The Wonderland!”)

Source: geyserofawesome.com via Jenny on Pinterest

 

So as you may have heard, I’m putting together my new show about all things awesomely ridiculous and ridiculously awesome and I would love, love, love YOUR story to be a part of it!

During each and every show I will be reading out a letter from somebody – YOU?! – sharing a story about something fabulous, wonderful and/or awe-inspiring that has happened in your lifetime.

It can be about a place, a person, an act of random kindness, it can be hilarious, it can be heartbreaking.

Whatever your story is to share, it just has to be:

- true; and

- about something that made you feel – even for a split second – that the world was a wonderland.

I first got this idea of sharing audience-generated stories when I lived in Canada and was introduced to the work of Stuart Maclean of The Vinyl Cafe, who does this often at his shows and I immediately fell in love. Another massive inspiration to me on the power of storytelling is the fantastic work of The Moth. I highly recommend checking out both these links if you’re in need of some inspiration!

The plan is to record these stories at each show, upload them online and then send you the link (hopefully we will have you there in the audience on the night to enjoy it for yourself too, but worst case, you will get a copy of the performance!) plus we’ll send you a little pack of goodies as thanks!

Keen to be part of Wonderland? Email your story here! And please let me know when you write if you’re planning to be at this year’s Woodford Folk Festival, or next year’s Adelaide Fringe or Brisbane Comedy Festival. (Note: you do not HAVE to be at any of the above to contribute, but if you are planning to be at any, let me know so that if your story is shared, we can tee it up so you’re in the audience that night!)

Wanna be part of it but just wanna share something short and sweet?
Share a short moment of awesome on my Facebook page or tweet me @jennywynter with hashtag #wonderland
Your post or tweet might be featured during the show too!

Woohoo! Yours in wonderlandish-storysharing,

Jen. x

Pink as performance fitspiration (or “This Blog May Soon Include a Health Section!”)

Source: chacha.com via Annette on Pinterest

 

When it comes to weight and body image, I constantly flit between “If I’m gonna be in showbiz, I’ve gotta be slim!” and “Bugger it. Look at Adele!”

The thing is, I don’t want to be somebody who’s constantly unhappy with their body. I don’t want my daughter to grow up seeing me criticise myself for not being in the shape I think I ‘should be.’ I don’t want to wish my life away dreaming of the alternative ‘me’ that exists out there in some realm that I could reach if only I wasn’t so lazy and undisciplined.

But…there’s a fine line between that mindset (all of which I still stand by) and justifying a descent into chronic unhealthiness.

The Catalyst:

Early this week I noticed on facebook that one of my Adelaide cabaret chums had accepted a bet on Dietbet. Intrigued, I followed the link. Basically the deal is you chip in some $$ into a prizepool, each of you committing to lose 4% of your body weight in 28 days. ANYBODY who does so wins a share of the pot. Meaning of course, that if all of you in the bet achieve your goal, you get your money back. If only one person does, they score 100% of the winnings. And so on. Being my insanely competitive self, I decided to give it a whirl, but in a pretty half-hearted “oh well, this could be interesting!” kinda way. It was only when I did my official weigh-in that my mind boggled at how far I’d let things slide. It wasn’t just the number on the scale (though of course, that was the major thing staring me in my shocked little face). As I stared at that number, I sadly thought about my body and just how CRAP I feel on any given day. Tired. ALL THE TIME. Achy. ALL THE TIME. In pain ALL THE TIME (though in fairness, that is injury-related). As I stepped off that scale, my motivation finally kicked in. It’s now or never. GAME ON.

So Far:

I truly cannot believe it can be true, but perhaps my body is just adjusting to this new plan of attack in a massive way? I stepped on the scales this morning – I think 5 days after I started – and I have already lost 3kg. Truly. I’m questioning if my scales are broken. (My hubby checked and swears they’re not). I’m so thrilled…SOMETHING’S WORKING.

My Inspiration:

There are a ton of amazingly healthy people in the world to be in awe of, but honestly, the one who’s inspiring me the most right now? Pink.

As a performer, seeing how her physical form translates into her being able to give 110% of herself to her audience (talk about your body being your instrument!) and really allowing her to totally fulfil her potential onstage…I don’t think anything has inspired me so much to get in shape EVER as this:

I’m also a long-term follower of Sarah Wilson’s blog (note below one of my major tactics in this quest is to cut out sugar, in no short way inspired by Sarah’s indepth explorations of the topic), and am in real life, inspired by my friend (and fellow Betty) Kate Mackie who lost a ton of weight (I think it’s well over 40kg?) through Michelle Bridges’ challenge. AMAZING. I need to know it is possible!

My Tactics:

Cut out sugar. Replace with stevia. I’ve also been told rice malt syrup is awesome, haven’t been able to find it at my usual shopping haunt but will hunt it down and give it a go!

Cut out wheat (which is recommended for my thyroid condition anyway).

Replace softdrinks with mineral water with lemon and mint.

Stretch as often as I think of it.

Drink water as often as I think of it.

Focus on protein and veges at each and every meal.

Eat often (snacking obviously on healthy alternatives, celery and cottage cheese is my go-to right now).

That’s it.

Any more complicated and I give up.

Knowing my WHY:

I’ve realised how important it is to sustain any motivation whatsoever, that I am clear on the WHY of this undertaking. Why bother? Why make the effort? Why get healthy?

I’ve really been mulling this over and over in my mind these past few days and I think I’ve got it down to this:

I want to fulfil my potential as a performer, as a mother, as a human being. I want to wear whatever I want onstage and off, I want to be able to have the energy, stamina and flexibility to do what I want onstage and off, I want to make this engine run at its full capacity.

Since my car crash I’ve had to come to terms with pain and its presence in my everyday life, as well as the limitations that are now just part of my body. BUT…that doesn’t mean I can’t still make the most of what I’ve got. I’m still walking, I’m still standing, I’m still here, damn it. And to do all the crazy shizz I’ve got in mind in this lifetime I really need to have at my disposal a clean and firing-on-all-cylinders body.

So yes. Unexpectedly – but excitedly – I shall be henceforth blogging this new journey as part of our regular CM updates. To help keep me accountable and hopefully sharing some lessons learned along the way  if nothing else!

If you’ve got any inspiration, tips or advice, please feel free to hurl it towards me, I am one of those people who LOVES reading umpteen health magazines (and usually expecting to feel fitter by osmosis) but point is, I really dig the motivation that comes from hearing other people’s thoughts.

xo

Crowdfunding and Crowdsurfing

Found this last night in my daughter’s school-book as she did her homework.

I never really thought about support in those terms before. It was timely. It’s been on my mind. Support. Namely cos I’ve never really felt so supported – nor indeed, have I had to ask so much for it – as I have this year. Truly. I am sick of the sound of my own cyber-voice. Honestly. I want to scream at myself “ENOUGH ALREADY! People can only take so much of your incessant call to arms!”

Stopping me from stabbing myself in the tongue with a pitchfork, however, is:

a) the reality that I don’t even know whether pitchforks actually exist anymore; and

b) the awesomeness of peeps actually getting behind this crazy campaign. Despite the fact I just spent the past two months screaming at them to support the charity fundraiser.

No kidding. Over the weekend, thanks to a bunch of you guys pledging in one hit, we managed to make the “Popular” list on pozible, and as I type this we are sitting at the 44% mark of our goal. I’m madly thinking up some extra surprise goodies to give to you guys, just to say thank you.

By the way, if you haven’t yet checked out Pozible, you really should. Not just cos of me. There are SO many amazing projects on there, it really is something else. I’ve already pledged some $ myself to some highly worthy projects, including:

1) a tour of a film about refugees;

2) a friend’s doco about gay marriage; and

3) a fab writer’s mission to write a novel based on her great-great-grandmother’s life story.

I also just found out about this ROCKING project to record a new CD called Choristry, directed by a new cabaret friend I made this year, the scrumptious Trevor Jones.

Do I sound cool now? COS DAMN I FEEL IT!

Truly. Try it. Instant self-esteem boost: support somebody.

Doesn’t matter who. Hopefully not a wench or a war-lord. But my point in writing this post is not to say “me, me, me!” (I’ve done enough of that to last me a lifetime in the past week alone thank you very much), but to just point out that in general, it is a rocking thing indeed to get behind folks who are attempting grand acts of creativity. We need cheerleaders. Champions. Financial and otherwise. And it feels good to BE a cheerleader and a champion.

It’s like being in a moshpit (full disclosure: haven’t been in one since my heady teen Pearl Jam days) and you’re part of the living mass of hands holding up a crowd-surfer. Even though somebody else is up there riding the wave, feeling the adrenalin rush, you are still part of that trip. Your hands combine with those of masses of strangers for those few short seconds, to create a ride that otherwise would just be some random smashing their spine on the floor while you look on with shrugged shoulders. But they’re not. And you’re not. For those few moments, you are all part of something.

Or you are just holding your arms up desperately hoping to avoid a boot in your eye.

Either way, you’re still keeping somebody from falling. And holding them up.

Source: blogs.wickedlocal.com via Sherri on Pinterest

Sharing the Truth of Mummyhood

Above: a rare moment having the best of both worlds, taken in our hotel room on tour with the fam a few months ago.

I am absolutely crap, as in CRAPPEDY CRAP CRAP CRAP at keeping up with comments on my youtube channel. Facebook on the other hand? I’m a genius. But youtube? Forget it.

But today, I caught up. I always brace myself before I ever check these random commenters’ posts, readying for for the punch in the guts that could just be round the corner. But…the ones I uncovered today – and then sheepishly replied to these many months after they were originally posted! – were actually rather lovely.

This one stood out, re: last year’s home tour video: “Keep up the good work of sharing the truth of mummy hood.”

It struck a nerve because here’s the thing: half the time on here, I don’t feel like I do.

I share the good stuff. Some of the crap stuff, but not really the truth of what’s going on day to day. When people used to say to me “I don’t know how you do it!” I would shrug it off, but now if you say that to me in person I’m likely to actually confess the reality, that I’m on the verge of a nervous breakdown when things get beyond insane. But for some reason I’ve loathe to commit these confessions in the written form. So…while I’m freshly motivated but the lovely words of this dear stranger on youtube, I’m gonna share some truth. Dig.

The Truth of Mummyhood: HOW I DO IT ALL.

by Jenny.

1. I cut corners. Often. Religiously. The biggest one of these is housework. Which would be fine, except that I actually do happen to enjoy having a clean space. I find it difficult to ignore crap. On Saturday when cleaning under our bed (only because we were having my grandma over, who has an uncanny knack for looking at my post-clean efforts and saying “Wow, you really need to clean up in here!”) I found clothes I hadn’t seen in months, fluff, cups, a lost DVD from the library and a baby bottle teat. We don’t even have a baby. I had a moment and collapsed in defeat on the bed, while the kids gathered round, gave me cuddles and offered to clean the whole house while I slept. I felt like some sort of bogan Cleopatra. I HATE things being out of order, hate it. But…I hate it far less than I hate not getting any creative work done. So…there you go. It is my choice. And I choose a messy house.

2. Sometimes I ignore the kids while I work. I comfort myself with articles that talk about how the french do this and how ignoring them is actually a form of superior parenting. Then I get back to beating myself up about it. Then I inevitably compensate by taking them out for fish and chips on the beach. It’s basically a cycle of PARENTING FAIL, PARENTING WIN, PARENTING FAIL, PARENTING WIN, which goes in direct disproportion to my other cycle of WORK WIN, WORK FAIL, WORK WIN, WORK FAIL. This amazing article I read recently (which could spark off an entire other series of posts on here from all the thoughts and feelings it brought up in me alone), talked about this concept far more eloquently than I can.

3. I sacrifice sleep. It is not unusual to be still working at 2.30 in the morning. I actually really enjoy what I do (I’m lucky, aside from some of the boring admin details I’d rather delegate, I actually do enjoy the marketing, promo and of course, writing work that comes with freelancing as a performer.) The downside? It makes it really hard to pry my butt away from the computer when I should be. And it makes my back hurt. More.

4. I am a super-fast typer. Last time I was measured I was 103wpm. This is not really a confession in itself, but I think it’s important to be honest about how I actually can get a lot done in a small amount of time. I’m not saying that to boast, just to explain how it is possible for me to get through an absolute TON of works (emails, media releases, show blurbs, etc.) pretty quickly: typing fast. I honestly think it’s the best skill I’ve ever mastered. I am buying my kids this computer typing tutor (the very one I learned on) soon.

5. Some nights we have baked beans on toast for dinner. I’m not even sure what the kids eat*.

*Joke.

In summary, much of the time my home time feels like a gong show, but when I really think about what I want from life, I know that above all, I just want it to be full.

And it is.

Chaotically, messy, disorganisedly, crazy, loud, over-the-top, failure-riddled, at times just plain overwhelmingly, on-the-verge-of-a-breakdown FULL.

But, I know that:

a) this is my choice; and

b) I will NEVER do it all.

And today, that is the truth of mummy hood.

Smiling Through The Overwhelm: IT IS STILL POSSIBLE!

Source: aspinstersguidetodating.blogspot.com via Crosby on Pinterest

So…

Just over four days to go, and the official tally as of tonight is: $3096.50.

Meaning of course: just under 7k to raise in the next four days.

Am I insane to still be thinking it is actually possible?

Of course, it still requires an element of magic – however, with several significant events planned this weekend alone (cabaret, comedy, and a garage sale among them: you can click here if you’re keen on the full details) so long as they perform well & with a bit of luck on the donation side in the coming days (by my calculations I need to muster up another $1k in donations, with the events taking care of the rest): I REALLY DO BELIEVE IT’S STILL POSSIBLE.

Likely? No. Ambitious? Totally. Possible? Yes!

Of course, come Monday morning, even that I have written this in quite a public way puts me out there as either:

a) a believer who got this shizz done!; or

b) a more than mildly embarrassed Pollyanna.

P.S. Donations will be welcomed with warm loving cuddles & metaphorical chocolate muffins straight out of the oven.

P.P.S. Thank you for bearing with me in this overwhelmingly overwhelming time of pleading, hair-tearing and fundraise-speak. Whether you donate or not, for that, I am so terribly grateful!

xo

The Good, The Bad and the Fundraising

The gorgeous Ruth Sullivan and I improvising a song onstage at Friday’s fundraising gig.

It’s a tough gig this fundraising thing. I am stressed. But trying to breathe. And taking massive comfort in the support of those around me who are jumping on board the mission to help make this happen. Like in life in general I guess, we have to remember in times of overwhelm that WE ARE NOT ALONE.

Take for instance this weekend just gone. Saturday morning, the morning after the comedy fundraiser here in Brissie – a cause to which many fabulous comedians I love donated their time to rock the house – I woke up feeling sweaty and panicked. Sweat-icked. Why? Because despite a ton of buzz on facebook, lots of RSVPs, an awesome lineup, some newspaper coverage and other indicators that it would be a near-full house, the audience turn-out to the gig was seriously disappointing. The audience itself, however, was quite the opposite, which was lovely. So supportive, I think almost every single one of them bought raffle tickets during the night and by the end of it we’d all bonded, in no small part due to the presence of an incredible trio of elderly people, including the star of the night, little old lady Peg, who stunned us all by going from “the elephant most likely to be offended in the room”to “the life of the smutty party”when she got up onstage, told a stunningly raunchy joke and then proceeded to share her other crackers with individual tables, liberally dropping the c bomb as I dropped my jaw-bomb.

It was indeed, a classic night. I loved it.

Our delicious audience! Nom nom nom.

More improv-ing. Hopefully improving.

But yes, come Saturday morning, when I counted up our total raised, panic stations. I had planned for this evening to make around $2000, yet we were so far below that I wanted to cry. I nearly did. I wondered why the heck I had even embarked on this mad mission. Oh yes, that’s right. Because I’m a camera ham who cannot say no to an exciting idea. Cue my daughter: “Couldn’t we just clean people’s houses and then donate the money that way?” Two thoughts passed through my head. That of attempting to do over eight thousand dollars worth of cleaning in a week – indeed, a total likely to exceed my cumulative cleaning total of a lifetime – and then, that of the beauty of my girl. Her sweetness in even offering to to do that at all – a thought which made the sloth in me all but convulse – and that more importantly, SHE STILL BELIEVES THIS IS DOABLE.

I put an impassioned lay-it-on-the-line gut-spill on facebook and to my honest shock and delight, people started donating, small bits, large bits (mostly large bits!) and by the end of the weekend, we passed $2500. A quarter of the way there. NEARLY where we would have been at had the comedy night gone according to plan. PLUS several tremendously good people have offered to help out in other ways this week to make this thing happen. I’m still more than a little panicked, truth be told. But I’m hanging in there. My belief is finding its feet again. I AM NOT ALONE.

“”Phew!!!!!!!!”doesn’t even really cut it, as my true emotion is some combination of relief, hope, gratitude and happy dance. And this is only at the quarter mark point. There’s still 7 days – and a whole lotta turf – to cover. (Which, incidentally, if you do have a buck or two to spare, you can do that in two or three clicks here. Either way, whether you support in thought or in dollar, you have my huge gratitude!)

I seriously think at the end of this, if and when I see that fundraising total clip over the $10,000 mark, my reaction is gonna be one of either this:

Source: carolyncaseyy.tumblr.com via Alex on Pinterest

but most likely this:

Source: katiedaisyart.blogspot.com via Jenny on Pinterest

 

Life you crazy minx.

There’s SO much I want to do, that’s part of the problem, knowing how to not get distracted by the next shiny thing that passes through my sight and stay on path to the big picture long-term things I REALLY wanna do.

You?

Quote of the Week

A man is not old until his regrets take the place of his dreams.
Yiddish Proverb.